dougbce's Blog

Oh boy Mayor Funkhauser I believe you are going completely off your rocker.  When are you going to be in the news, and you alone and not your precious Gloria?  You have topped it all now.  You are suing your own city that you are the mayor of?   Am I reading the article right? 

Are you trying to become a comedian?  If so I think it's possible that you  might have a good shot at it.  Sooner or later you are going to start appearing on comedy shows disgracing this cities mayor.  They could make a great skit of you and Gloria on MadTV or SNL or Comdy Central.

What the heck is wrong with you?  "Oh my gosh Gloria it's been over a week since we appeared in the news, so lets have a news conference at our house and tell all the reporters we are going to sue the city" says the mayor.  "Oh what a great idea, Funky!  I miss going to your office and riduculing people so much" says Gloria.

You two are completely off your rocker!

Hey by the way Mr. Mayor I just wanted to let you know your office is at 11th & Oak in downtown Kansas City.  Maybe you should call a cab to take you there since apparently you don't know where it is.

Last night around the state of Missouri the high school playoffs cranked up, unfortunately on the Kansas City side of the state many games were suspended or postponed until tonight due the weather (lightning).

However there were some games around the metro that did get played.

Kearney dumped Platte County 48-0.

Orrick over Maysville 38-0. 

Pleasant Hill over Booneville 28-14.

Sedalia Smith-Cotton over Grandview 47-12.

Trenton over Lawson 29-22.

West Platte over Rockport 48-7.

Hogan Prep over Knob Noster 38-21.

Kearney, Orrick, Smith-Cotton and Hogan Prep all remain undefeated on the year.

Lots of games resume or begin this evening that were delayed last night.

This coming Monday night another round of Blue Springs @ Rockhurst.

 

There's an article all about this earthquake on Fox 4's main page currently if you would like to remember more about it, but I'm curious to know with this being near the Pakistan / Afghanistan border:

Are any US troops nearby?

Did it perhaps kill any of the Taliban?

Or perhaps Al Qaeda whacko's?

Maybe some of those mudslides shown and mountains falling caved in on top of Bin Laden!

I was just browsing around checking out the rankings in the state and scores from last night and there is one team that just stands out on the Missouri side.
Class 1A Orrick Bearcats - Winners of 23 games in a row now, the defending state champion in 1A.  In 9 games this season Orrick has given up 20 points to it's opponents.  That's sick.  In fact 6 opponents have been shut out with the most being scored by any team was a measily 8.  All of this while averaging nearly 42 points a game.  42-3 average score of every game.  That is domination!
And my Park Hill boys got a very nice win over Oak Park last night.  Going in to the final week of the season it will be interesting to see how the playoffs shape out with the addition of more teams this year.

I have so many thoughts leading up to this weekends game, but the problem is they are very negative.

Looking back just a few years ago, when the Chiefs were a much better team how many Chiefs fans would of traveled to Nashville if we were playing there.  So it interests me in seeing how many Tennessee Titans fans will make the 550 mile trip Sunday to Arrowhead.  I have a feeling a lot, however to my surprise just posted on the Chiefs site is article indicating the Titans have returned some tickets for this Sunday's game from there allotment, therefore they are back on sell in Kansas City...hmmmmm

Ok, now for the really bad.  Are you aware when Brodie Croyle actually made his last start in Arrowhead Stadium?  December 16, 2007!  Guess who it was against?  Tennessee

Brodie completed 25 of 43 passes for a career-high 217 yards with a career-high two TDs and two INTs to go with one carry for six yards vs. Tennessee (12/16).  The Chiefs lost.

Tennessee comes into this game with the #1 scoring defense, and the #1 turnover defense. 

Will Tony Gonzales still be a Chief come Sunday?  Will Brodie get his 1st win?  Or better yet will Brodie make it through the game without getting hurt?

This is a horrible matchup for us this weekend, but you never know!  Which team shows up?  The one that played Denver or the one that played Oakland and Carolina?

1st off the 10 million dollar question is, if Shirley Riggs has tried to flee with her children 3 times prior to this one, then how did she have an unsupervised visit to begin with?  Does anyone believe if this was  a guy in the same situation they wouldn't be in jail?  She might just get her time on this one, but now it comes out that she is trying to get into the Cherokee nation in Oklahoma and then she would be able to avoid state laws.  I don't know much about the Cherokee nation, but I'm willing to bet they have morals, which is why she ended up in Washington and not in Oklahoma like many thought.  Just maybe the Cherokee nation told her now way, get out, go away, we don't want all the police around and so on.  This will be very interesting to follow an see what the outcome of the charges are this time around.

Also Fox 4 why do you have pictures of her art work on your site?  OK, I'll give you a pass, maybe it could be said if you seen anything like them it might help in finding the kids, but now that they are found, she needs no fame for her little angels.

Australian boy wreaks zoo havoc while feeding croc

The parents of a 7-year-old boy who broke into an Australian outback zoo and fed a string of small animals to its resident crocodile are likely to be sued after police said the boy was too young to be held responsible.

A turtle, four western blue tongue lizards, two bearded dragons, two thorny devil lizards and a 1.8 metre (5.9ft) adult female Spencer's goanna were fed or led into the jaws of a 3 metre, 200kg (440lb) saltwater crocodile named "Terry."

Security camera footage at the Alice Springs Reptile Centre showed the smiling youngster also bludgeoning to death a small blue tongue lizard and two more thorny devils during a half-hour of breakfast-time havoc last Wednesday.

"The fact a 7-year-old can wreak so much havoc in such a short time, it's unbelievable. In my day he'd get a big boot up the arse," centre director Rex Neindorf told Reuters by phone.

"Police found him, but in the Northern Territory here he can't be accountable if he's under 10 years of age."

Neindorf said many of the animals fed to the croc were rare or mature and would be difficult to replace.

The boy was unknown at the centre and had "clammed up" when questioned by police on what sparked the rampage, he said.

Neindorf said he was now looking at suing the parents of the pint-sized terror, who could easily have been taken by Terry himself as he fed the croc from a small landing at his enclosure.

"We'll be looking at suing the parents, who were supposedly in control of him at the time," he said.

Ever since 9-11 I think we all know you can't park at the curb of airport and leave your car there.  Isn't this kind of in the common sense category.  It's kind of the same rule as leaving your luggage unattended while in the airport. 

Hello!  Mrs. Funkhuaser have you been paying attention to the rest of the world.  We have terror threats galore, car bombs, bombs in luggage.  terrorists on airplanes.  Apparently your not paying attention.  Did you know that telling the bell hop your the mayors wife doesn't mean anything?  Maybe if you tell him you're the mayor next time that will work for you.

Nice job by the KCI police not taking the b.s.!

And why you might ask?  Because I got rid of my piece of junk 1987 Chevy Celebrity before it died on it's own.  I truly hoped that you "Mr. Mercedes I own the road" would run a red light in front of me just so I could stick the nose of old whitey out in front of you so you could buy me a new car, but it didn't happen.

Or you "Miss cell phone queen putting on your makeup" would change lanes when ever you felt like it, instead of when it's actually clear.

But now I like my car so I hope you two just stay away from me now.

I just want to say thank you to Kansas City, Missouri for giving me my big blue recycle bin, because between all these dang newspapers and new phone books I get, I need something to put them in.

I don't know what the requirements are for the Metro bus drivers, but one of them certainly is not patience.  Taxi Drivers, Limo Drivers, Crazy People in there Hummer, they are nothing.  Just being any where near the Metro on the road is scary.  I would rather ride next to a semi traveling 70 MPH down I-70. 

I realize the little Metro cop guy is riding around in his Tauras making sure you are on time and all that good stuff.  But last time I checked the drivers manual I didn't see any exclusions for bus drivers.

If you're a Metro Bus driver I'm not trying to offend you.  I am sure there are probably some of you that are very good at your job, but you're not on the roads that I travel.

Passing on shoulders, merging out of the parking lanes when the people are on or off the bus, as opposed to when traffic is clear.  Have your kids show you 3 different colors and educate you on which of them mean in the traffic world.  RED, GREEN, YELLOW!

p.s.  If you were riding your bike down Burlington this morning in the bike lane, I bet that bus scared the hell out of you.  The bus driver mis-interpreted the sign that says bike lane. 

I'm sure I'm not the only one with this problem, but since moving to my new neighborhood in May I notice more and more cars everyday parking in the street.  First off, sure it's legal so no big deal right.  Well, I'm just curious why you bought that house with that nice double wide driveway that you never use.  There is no basketball goal setup so you can't use that excuse.  You don't have kids in your driveway making a hopscotch board with big fat chalk.  So why do you want to park your brand new F150 or Accura in the road.  Are you hoping it gets hit?  I guess people are just strange like that.

Oh I know why, it's so you have actually walk more than 10 feet to your door, then you can call it excercise.  Well maybe not!

The Dam Notice 


  


This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries regarding a pond on his property. It was sent by the Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Quality, State of  Pennsylvania . This guy's response is hilarious, but read the State's letter before you get to the response letter. 



SUBJECT: DEQ File No.97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Lycoming County 

Dear Mr. DeVries: 

It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above referenced parcel of property. You have been certified as the legal landowner and/or contractor who did the following unauthorized activity: Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the outlet stream of Spring Pond. 


A permit must be issued prior to the start of this type of activity. A review of the Department's files shows that no permits have been issued. Therefore, the Department has determined that this activity is in violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Pennsylvania Compiled Laws, annotated. 


The Department has been informed that one or both of the dams partially failed during a recent rain event, causing debris and flooding at downstream locations. 
We find that dams of this nature are inherently haza rdous and cannot be permitted.

The Department therefore orders you to cease and desist all activities at this location, and to restore the stream to a free-flow condition by removing all wood and brush forming the dams from the stream channel. All restoration work shall be completed no later than January 31, 2008. 

Please notify this office when the restoration has been completed so that a follow-up site inspection may be schedu led by our staff. Failure to comply with this request or any further unauthorized activity on the site may result in this case being referred for elevated enforcement action. We anticipate and would appreciate your full cooperation in this matter. Please feel free to contact me at this office if you have any questions. 

Sincerely, 

David L. Price 
District Representative and Water Management Division. 


Here is the actual response sent back by Mr. DeVries: 


Re: DEQ File No. 97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Lycoming County 

Dear Mr. Price, 

Your certified letter dated 11/25/07 has been handed to me to respond to. 
I am the legal landowner but not the Contractor at 2088 Dagget Lane , Trout Run,  Pennsylvania . 

A couple of beavers are in the (State unauthorized) process of constructing and maintaining two wood 'debris' dams across the outlet stream of my Spring Pond. While I did not pay for, authorize, nor supervise their dam project, I think they would be highly offended that you call their skillful use of natures building materials 'debris.' 

I would like to challenge your department to attempt to emulate their dam project any time and/or any place you choose. I believe I can safely state there is no way you could ever match their dam skills, their dam resourcefulness, their dam ingenuity, their dam persistence, their dam determination and/or their dam work ethic. 


  
These are the beavers/contractors you are seeking. As to your request, I do not think the beavers are aware that they must first fill out a dam permit prior to the start of this type of dam activity. 

My first dam question to you is: 

(1) Are you trying to discriminate against my Spring Pond Beavers, or 

(2) do you require all beavers throughout this State to conform to said dam request? 

If you are not discriminating against these particular beavers, through the Freedom of Information Act, I request completed copies of all those other applicable beaver dam permits that have been issued. 

(Perhaps we will see if there really is a dam violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Pennsylvania  Compiled Laws, annotated.) 

I have several concerns. My first concern is, aren't the beavers entitled to legal representation? The Spring Pond Beavers are financially destitute and are unable to pay for said representation -- so the State will have to provide them with a dam lawyer. The Department's dam concern that either one or both of the dams failed during a recent rain event, causing flooding, is proof that this is a natural occurrence, which the Department is required to protect. In other words, we should leave the Spring Pond Beavers alone rather than harassing them and calling them dam names. 

If you want the stream 'restored' to a dam free-flow condition please contact the beavers -- but if you are going to arrest them, they obviously did not pay any attention to your dam letter, they being unable to read English. 

In my humble opinion, the Spring Pond Beavers have a right to build their unauthorized dams as long as the sky is blue, the grass is green and water flows downstream. They have more dam rights than I do to live and enjoy Spring Pond. If the Department of Natural Resources and Environmental Protection lives up to its name, it should protect the natural r esources (Beavers) and the environment (Beavers' Dams). 

So, as far as the beavers and I are concerned, this dam case can be referred for more elevated enforcement action right now. Why wait until 1/31/2008? The Spring Pond Beavers may be under the dam ice then and there will be no way for you or your dam staff to contact/harass them. 

In conclusion, I would like to bring to your attention to a real environmental quality, health, problem in the area. It is the bears! Bears are actually defecating in our woods. I definitely believe you should be persecuting the defecating bears and leave the beavers alone. If you are going to investigate the beaver dam, watch your step! The bears are not careful where they dump! 

Being unable to comply with your dam request, and being unable to contact you on your dam answering machine, I am sending this response to your dam office. 

THANK YOU, 

RYAN DEVRIES 
& THE DAM BEAVERS

I just went by the Sprint Center at 12:15PM on  a Friday afternoon to by tickets for American Idol and guess what I found?  Nothing, all of the ticket windows are all locked up and blinds pulled down.  So I asked one of the employees at the CBE if they were open and his comment was

"nope, haven't seen them all day, they show up when ever they feel like"

Are you kidding me?  So I gave them the benefit of the doubt and had lunch across the street and waited til after 1PM, thinking maybe they went to lunch too....nope still no one in sight..............uggghhh!

  
BULLETIN - EAS ACTIVATION REQUESTED  
SEVERE THUNDERSTORM WARNING  
NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE KANSAS CITY/PLEASANT HILL MO  
317 PM CDT THU APR 17 2008  
 
THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE IN PLEASANT HILL HAS ISSUED A  
 
* SEVERE THUNDERSTORM WARNING FOR...  
  EASTERN JOHNSON COUNTY IN EAST CENTRAL KANSAS  
  SOUTHEASTERN WYANDOTTE COUNTY IN NORTHEAST KANSAS  
  NORTHWESTERN JACKSON COUNTY IN WEST CENTRAL MISSOURI  
 
* UNTIL 345 PM CDT  
 
* AT 312 PM CDT...NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE DOPPLER RADAR INDICATED A  
  SEVERE THUNDERSTORM CAPABLE OF PRODUCING QUARTER SIZE HAIL.  THIS  
  STORM WAS LOCATED NEAR SPRING HILL...AND MOVING NORTHEAST AT 45  
  MPH.  
 
* THE SEVERE THUNDERSTORM WILL BE NEAR...  
  LENEXA BY 330 PM CDT.  
  LEAWOOD AND OVERLAND PARK BY 335 PM CDT.  
  PRAIRIE VILLAGE...MISSION HILLS...MISSION WOODS AND WESTWOOD HILLS  
  BY 340 PM CDT.  
RAYTOWN...6 MILES SOUTHEAST OF KANSAS CITY...7 MILES SOUTH OF NORTH  
  KANSAS CITY AND 8 MILES SOUTHWEST OF SUGAR CREEK BY 345 PM CDT.  
 
THE TOWNS OF JOHNSON CO ARPT...STANLEY...LACKMANS AND ROELAND PARK  
ARE ALSO IN THE PATH OF THIS SEVERE THUNDERSTORM.  
 
QUARTER SIZE HAIL HAS BEEN REPORTED IN SPRING HILL WITH THIS STORM.   
IF YOU ARE IN THE PATH OF THE STORM...TAKE IMMEDIATE ACTION TO   
PROTECT LIFE AND PROPERTY.  
 
TO REPORT SEVERE WEATHER...CONTACT YOUR NEAREST LAW ENFORCEMENT  
AGENCY. THEY WILL RELAY YOUR REPORT TO THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE  
IN PLEASANT HILL.